Ode to the M4

M4 …that sounds like some kind of cloak and dagger code  key, ….a weapon… or a drug variant . That was how incorrect I was when I first heard of  M4….…” try and make it to…. M4 ….” . That is what Ms Vee  , advised  me as a beginner on the fourth floor. . Though, I was rather keen on Ms Vee’s …well…(ahem) …. V, ,,,she seemed overtly  interested  in M4. 

M4, that was the first level managerial cadre , it was at that level that one graduated from standing around somebody else’s table to getting a table of your own. This came with perks such as your extension number, a dustbin, a shiny set of staplers , scissors, glue stick,  post it , ruler, memo pad, letter heads, and the office boy served you  tea in a cup and saucer instead of polystyrene disposable . Extended privileges included a mega food bill, that passed off in  the yellow slip as “ Staff welfare “ or “ selling expenses “ ( which, actually,  you and your friends  bribed off some sleazy waiter while discussing ..strategy ..with Kingfisher , Budweiser and the like)

M4 that was the place to be, that was my dream coming true , finally , I  figured in the hierarchy…. all that toil,  sweat, double crossing dirty politics had finally paid off …I have arrived. This was only the beginning of a legacy ,…. M4, M3, M2, M1…and then ….U ( unclassified ) . At ‘U”,  I suppose , you could probably take Ms Vee home. Risks looked minimal ….at least to me then…I did wonder why the guys in M3, M2 and the rest …looked….constipated most of the time ..Well not me …I was raring to go…things would be different here now …I have taken over…watch me !!..........the rest is history.

I have been with the M3s , M2s, M1s  and the Us and learnt quite a bit, and decided to dedicate this post to them  …some posthumously, to some with malice, and to some with pure unadulterated hate. To some with respect and some with gratitude , and to some with nothing whatsoever …these are the ones that did or did not make a difference . I have seen them handle conflicts,  ….take decisions, handle ethics , hire , fire , promote , demote, politicize and desensitize, patronize and tear to shreds…all in a days work. Here is a snapshot  and  tip from them each of them…..

Type :  Ascharya ( M3 )

Male 45 : I like to surprise everybody including myself, say yes when everybody thinks I will say no !! see ...surprise ... the basis of a decision…will it help surprise?.... then …get it done  . In his case… the ends always justifies the means. Short meetings, surprise on the move, quick decisions ,  there is no such thing as a right or wrong decision ..its just a decision …...then another one...if i said yes...it was because i was drunk...all is forgiven and acceptable if it ends with Old Monk, and i do not have to pay for it. 

Happiness is a permit card.

Tip : Life is short, Live it well …always at somebody else’s expense , bless him.

Type : Muhavra ( M1 )

Male 50 : Everybody body must adore idli and sambaar. Everything in business, can be a proverb in action or a vision statement .The second string of the management , must always be from the military , nowhere else could you get discipline and sheer stupidity as package.  In fact a vision , led to a mission, for those who could not figure out the difference it was just ....confusion. Patronize 5% …..confuse the rest. All reports must be in quadruplicate, how else could you find the figures if you misplaced one set.

Happiness is hearing the words “ Yes Sir…Will do Sir” 

Tip : Be a visionary…hire ex-military NCOs…they are trained…thats all..  your will ...will be done.

Type : Eda-Peda ( M4 )

Male : 55, pretends to be 35,  beer belly is the only legal belly, nobody can do anything better than me. Ride auto to save gas money , Microsoft Word  .,,,,duh ? ….Windows …what ? …everybody is a cheat, trust no one. They are the “ eda bankey peda khana types “ Listen more  …talk less …write everything…that’s what notepads are for …never be the last in a conversation…not because I gave up , but because I  really don’t know what to say …how would I anyway ? … it is  not on the brochure…nor on my notepad

 Happiness is a notepad , a pen and a bottle of cheap beer. 

Tip : Automation , MIS ….. and the rest is all a waste of time , it is correct only if I’ve written it down somewhere in my notepad .

Type  :  KHALASH ( M3 )

Male : 45 , movie star, in fact people notice only what i wear, do not let me open my mouth, if I do , my foot will go in. .Tearing hurry … for everything …Everything is a four letter explicit.  After my foot comes out of my mouth, …. Let me yell dirty …. mothers, fathers, in fact  I can improvise, with the rest if the kin  Books are meant for showcases , Competition – by Porter , looks good on the table. Just like me ….looks good. …

Happiness is a new suit every day ….

Tip : Everything will end one day, that day could be today…I think its already happening &%^!!!!.

Type : LIMELIGHT ( M1 )

Male : 40,  I grew real fast, I really do not know why, maybe it is because, I manage to get the limelight on me all the time. Everybody has a role…and most of them play it well. I really do not know my role , so I make do with a little bit of everybody’s role. Never go into details…read the last line only that’s where the results are     … I like to motivate people…I must do it quick…before I forget what I read in  the loo ….money is secondary for everybody else ... except  for me , for the rest  there is esteem, pride of ownership and the thrill of working with me …there …that’s me in the limelight again ….

Happiness is a 10 minute MBA guide , I wish it came with a dictionary though…

Tip: Everybody is dispensable , except me . 

.........await the rest , its called pacing...that's what  Limelight  calls it ...